Say it with me now: Life [Comma] Etc trip to the archives!
But, like goldfish growing to the size of their bowl, people grow and mature according to the post-graduation environment.
So, how do you decide who to keep in touch with and who to let go of? Here are three easy ways to figure it out:
Look At Your Phone
Facebook is a magical friendship device. It allows you to feel like you have 230+ friends, when in reality you might have two. Or none. Instead, look to your most personal of personal devices: your phone.
Who are you texting with? Who have you called and who has reciprocated? Those are the relationships you are already investing with. And if there aren’t any, cruise your friends list to find someone to connect with offline.
Look in the Mirror
We all have that college friend who we hang on to because He was there when….But what are you getting from the relationship now verses and how much you’re investing in it?
If you are keeping in touch with a friend who weighs you down or doesn’t reciprocate your interest or support, it might be time to break up. Because if you’re planning on being successful, you need to invest in people who will help you break through the challenges of your 20s and 30s and beyond. Not “paying it backwards” to people who were around way back when.
Have a long-term friend who challenges you and lets you adapt into new versions of yourself? Then you’re beyond lucky — keep that winner around. But if your old friends are more likely to question your desire to stop drinking or talk you into bad decisions… it’s time to say goodbye.
Look At Your Schedule
I am fascinated by how some people who stay in their college town gracefully mature into tailgating alumni, while others fall to the siren call of keggers and freshman parties into their 30s.
I’m also fascinated when I get an invite to one of those keggers and for about 10 minutes I want to go. And then I remember that 10pm sucks, and 12 midnight sucks even harder, not to mention what alcohol does to my autoimmune self nowadays.
So, look at your schedule. We all have the impromptu midnight Futurama party, or the once-every-two-years-drink-til-you-reboot-athon.
But, are you honestly still a night owl? Do you still enjoy how you feel when you drink (before and after)? And if so, are you a kegger girl or a happy hour and karaoke kind of guy?
If you’ve made the transition into mature morning-coffee dude, embrace it and don’t try to pretend to be something different. It’s okay to grow up. And then be honest with the friends who still party and respond with a mature “Thanks, but I’ll have to catch you next time!”